COMMON SENSE
The (sup and surf) sessions I had were less and shorter than usual. I would listen very well to my body, energy levels, state of mind and ‘gut’ feeling. I have pulled out of SUP events and cancelled sessions when conditions would seem too much to take on. Catching waves was either ‘Yay’ or ‘Nay’. “She who hesitates is lost” is a saying I train, compete and enjoy my water time with. Injuries happen more often when you hesitate. Go with the flow is the only way.
OPINIONS
Opinions are like assholes, everyone has got one! People were very opinionated towards this ‘expecting mermaid!’ I received a lot of their fear and disapproval. In response I asked them to give me faith and trust. Sure, the fearful advice came from a kind heart wanting the best for me. Still, it was super annoying at times. You can trust that you know deep down inside what is good for you.
BABY = CREATIVITY
Baby Jayden motivates me and makes me more creative than before I was a mum. When I have a few minutes now, I take advantage of switching my brain from mommy to Anne-Marie mode. When the ocean isn’t an option, I choose from jogging, swimming, writing, event organizing, cycling, walking the stroller, napping, doing some yoga, breath exercises or doing art or teaching a SUP lesson. Nothing hardcore; they are mainly sanity sessions. One amazing land outlet is golf! I shot my best 9 ever after whilst recovering from a caesarean! Being a mum is more restrictive in when I can do what I want. I am on a journey to just accept that’s how it goes instead of wanting it too much.
It is more fun that way for Jayden, Eric and I. Last time I was on Maui, Jayden was 5 months old. We barely slept; my body was exhausted breastfeeding and guiding Jayden through all the new climates and time zones. Figuring out what he could handle and what was too much. There was no energy left over to ‘hold a boom’ that trip. I barely caught a wave on a surf or SUP board. And it was ok! I could sit in my wetsuit with my son and Eric in a tide pool at Ho’okipa and it was the coolest thing ever!
BRIGHT FUTURE
Next week we’re headed to Maui again and now I NEED to windsurf for my job. Now we’re talking! The Starboard 2018 product photo shoot is happening and I am on the dream team. Can’t wait to reconnect with the team, introduce Jayden to them and do some ‘pole boarding’. Amanda Beenen and I are also now teammates for Hot Sails Maui. We really want to celebrate that having a session together and pondering collaborative windsurfing articles.
Jayden is a little older. He is taking the bottle now and we are starting to sleep a bit better. I am jogging a few times a week and log 19 lbs. around every day. I would say I am ready to windsurf my heart out. I also can’t wait to put a windsurf sail on a board and float around with Jayden whenever that day will be. He has been on the board with me since he was 3 weeks old. We will be on the water, floating with the wind in nature, our favourite place to be.
I am also lucky and grateful with my hubby Eric Totah who has a hard time staying away from the ocean just like myself. He surfed professionally and he knows what windsurfing and ‘getting my dome soaked’ means to me!
“ My goal shifted from wanting to improve my skills to just enjoyment of the ocean. ”